This article shows how good foods improve relationships. We have been discussing the correlation between a good cook and good relationship. The argument is whether a wife/fiancé who is a good cook is likely to be loved better than a kitchen newbie.
Now, a kitchen newbie is not a bad cook but someone that is about to become a great cook. I don’t believe in absolution, if you don’t know it today, you can be good at it tomorrow; it all depends on your drive and level of desire for delicious home made good foods.
If you are subscribed to my free weekly newsletter you probably read my email about how good foods improve love and relationship. This is just a child-birth of that email, the discussion continued here. The email was my own personal opinion with regards to my encounter and relationship with other women but what we have here is a collective idea.
More like a discussion, as a matter of fact you can also add your own comment via the comment form below.
So do you think there are benefits to being a good cook… as a wife/fiance? Well… my answer would be a somewhat “yes”, and I will tell you my reasons.
I am quite aware of the controversial nature of this topic but no matter how far we would like to drag the subject, it would never erase the fact that women run the kitchen in the African setting.
This may change as western civilization absorbs the African culture but at the moment it is a fact that can never be neglected. Other factor that may also influence this culture would be the economic empowerment of women, but in the season and time we live in, women run the kitchen.
One can never truly comprehend the reason behind the angst and chaos that builds up in a home that is run by a kitchen newbie, sometimes it get to a point that the relationship between a couple becomes very fragile.
Just to prove a point, I got this email from a member of the kitchen sometimes ago
Hello Chy, thanks for your wonderful recipes and emails. Can you believe I was almost driven out of my husbands house because of foods? My husband makes me do all the cooking and wouldn’t eat out. At first I thought I couldn’t do it and it resulted into quarrels and troubles for me and my husband. The truth is that your website actually made me believe that I can cook, I made a decent soup yesterday and hope to improve with time, all thanks to you for saving my marriage o. God bless the kitchen (Mrs Catherine Ehulu)
I also got lots of emails after I sent the newsletter on “how good foods improves love/relationship” like this one below
You are so right Chy. Am not yet married, but believe me, I have seen how this food issues can destroy beautiful relationships. I dnt wanna take chances and I love new things. So, am ready to journey wit u into d great world of FOOD. Haha.
Like I did state initially, this is more like a discussion and there would be collective ideas. I do believe that every woman want to run a peaceful home and I have also learned from experience that being a motivated good cook makes the whole process a lot easier.
For the African woman; either you are a good cook or you are wealthy enough to employ a cook. I said in the email that a man is willing to pay for food stuff but most men would never pay a cook, either the woman cooks the food or she pays the cook 😀
However, there are exceptions; I have even seen families where men also love to cook; but that doesn’t happen often in our part of the world. In our part of the world there are just three options for the women.
- Allow the angst and chaos to get to the boiling point.
- Employ a cook.
- Learn to cook.
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My desire is that we would be motivated enough to take control of our individual kitchen, why? Because I have learned from experience that wives/fiances that are also good cooks end up getting more love and respect.
Here is what Ijeoma has to say.
“I thank you so much for bringing honor to my marriage. I’m two month old in marriage. I already know a little how to cook some foods but not all. You have added more knowledge to the little I know on how to make different types of foods. .My husband after eating asks me how I learned to make his native food. The taste of my meals is now the order of the day by my sister/brother in laws staying with me. They keep saying and I quote you are a great cook, did you go to any catering school?” I keep smiling each time they make that comment. Thanks and keep your flag flying. Blessing Ijeoma, Nigeria”
This goes a long way to reiterate the fact that a good cook wife/fiance is more likely to be loved and respected then a fresher. All of what you have read so far is not just my opinions but also that of diverse women from diverse backgrounds
Please use the comment box below, I would love to read your story, tell us how good foods improved your love life and relationship.